Heat oil in a large, heavy bottomed pot set over medium heat. Add the onion, and cook, stirring frequently until translucent, 3-4 minutes. Add the anchovies, chili flakes, fennel seed, and 1/2 tsp of kosher salt. Cook another minute, until anchovies have broken down and spices are fragrant.

Add the ground pork along with another 1/2 tsp of salt. Use the back of a spoon to break the meat up and cook for 5-6 minutes, stirring once or twice, until the meat has started to brown and lost its raw coloring. Add smashed garlic chunks and tomato paste and cook another minute or two, until garlic is fragrant and tomato paste has turned a dark red color.

Pour milk into the pot, stir to incorporate, and simmer gently until the milk has mostly evaporated. When most of the milk is gone, stir in the white wine. Continue cooking for 4-5 minutes until the liquid from the wine is mostly evaporated, then add the chopped and strained tomatoes. Add the bay leaf and the final 1/2 tsp salt, a few cranks of black pepper, and a stir to combine.

When the tomatoes begin to bubble, turn the heat down to a low simmer, and cook, stirring occasionally for 3- 3 1/2 hours, until sauce has thickened and meat has completely broken down. Stir in butter and fresh parsley. Taste, and add salt and pepper if needed.

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil, and add the gnocchi. Cook for 1-2 minutes, until the gnocchi floats to the surface of the water. Reserve 1/4 cup of cooking water, and drain gnocchi. Toss cooked gnocchi with ragu, using the reserved cooking water to loosen the sauce slightly to help coat the pasta. Serve, topped with freshly grated parmesan cheese.